My malicious reviews on Trip Advisor

In Trip Advisor I write only if I find something as really great or as really bad! And that under the pseudonym „Fred G". Of course, neither Fred nor I have an epicurean mission that the world is just waiting for, and tastes are different - but not with Fred and me. Nevertheless ... should we ever disagree, and a reader find my / his remarks too outlandish, trite or pretentious, I blame Fred, he's used to that.

So Fred Gerdes is a pseudonym, as is his photo by the way. In truth, it shows a well-known pedal steel guitarist, namely Bucky Baxter, an incredibly likeable guy who has played with Bob Dylan and other greats, a visage that makes any criticism just perfect and unquestionable! Well, that's my theory anyway... I met him once in Nashville and took this photo. Unfortunately Bucky passed away two years ago (2020), a great loss!

However, one should generally express a crude criticism of the platform Trip Advisor - as, by the way, also with reviews of doctors, locksmiths, hotels and other service providers: utmost caution!!! Because here useless nonsense and lies are spread. It is faked without scruples: „The food was super tasty and the waiters totally friendly and helpful!" Or reports of hostile competition: „We waited 40 minutes for the food. The waiters were unfriendly and the food was bad!"

I only use Trip Advisor for a quick overview of gastronomic offerings. Because neither the usual point ratings nor the "reviews" have any value. 
But especially when I like something very much or not at all, I just can't leave writing!

I hate waiters who refill your wine. When you need them, they're not there, or they keep coming and getting on your nerves when you don't need them!

2012-05 Ristorante Piazza Duomo, Alba, Piedmont, Italy - "molecular until the bills crackle"
You enter the restaurant through an almost undetectable, seemingly deliberately hidden side entrance in a small alley that leads off the Piazza Duomo to the right of a bistro. On the very secluded looking second floor, you are immediately surrounded by various waiters who would probably do ANYTHING for you. To begin with, two framed, transparent drink cards are handed to you with a selection of Proseccos, Champagnes and waters. The waters are advertised individually like the champagnes, but they are only San Pellegrino, Ferrarelle and one more, which you can buy in any supermarket, but each with indication of all its molecular components. So we quickly got up and left. We had already had something like that in San Sebastian.

2012-10 Pirata Bus - Formentera - Nordrheinwestfalen

The view of Migjorn beach is hard to beat. But still, you should only go to the Pirata Bus if you like to listen to petty, way-too-loud music while watching the dullest North Rhine-Westphalians all misbehave in a pile and pay relatively high prices for their drinks.

2012-10 Es Calo - Can Rafalet, Formentera

One enters. Impressive. A spacious, well-styled terrace overlooking the sea, protected from the wind by clear plastic in the fall, all sorts of waiters, a large "aquarium" of lobsters and langoustines. On the table a slim white blanket and white cloth napkins, nice, nice. But if you get closer to it, all this textile gives off an almost unbearable chemical stench, so that after using it once, you could only put the napkin far, far away to the side.
Appetizer - Salmorejo: this should actually be a shiny orange creamy substance, a mixture of tomatoes, garlic, grated bread, olive oil, vinegar and salt. The very fine grated bread is ultimately responsible for the creamy, firm consistency that distinguishes salmorejo from gazpacho. However, the huge amount of food served here was much too thin and contained huge amounts of salt and garlic. Please, no € 11, - for a salty, too thick Gazpacho!
Then came the Gallo (Sant Piere) fritado y encebollado - listed among the especially recommended dishes of the chef. However, one should not have ordered this already on the basis of the description! Our own fault! But the "Es Calo" made when entering as well as by already existing Vorschusslorbeeren (advice of a friend) a sufficiently dignified impression that one could have actually assumed that these people would bring no badly edible things on the table. In addition in the menu the more than flowery praises about the own ability. But far from it! The whole thing was very close to "fish - sweet and sour" in an inferior Chinese restaurant. Almost € 30,- per person!
The nicely planned dinner was quietly rounded off by cheap, Latino-sounding chill-out music. Better no music than something like that!

Conclusion: If you don't have the courage to bring defined food to the table, you just don't have the face to put halfway characterful music (and be it at least Van Morrison, Stones or Amy Winehouse) into the CD player.

2013-01-Ta' Frenc Restaurant, GOZO - "Dining spot for the nouveau riche"

foto not available and not needed!

Ghajn Damma Street | (Half way between Victoria & MForn), Xaghra, Gozo, Malta.

We were loaded into this supposedly the best restaurant on the island in terms of "New Year's Eve". The wine cellar would be enormous and they would take the best care of us. Ta Frenc makes a good impression from the outside. We were introduced to the Mätre and were served three glasses of champagne in the entrance area, all very hospitable seeming and cool. Then we took our table in the immediate vicinity of a piano player, who immediately began to intonate classical and Christmas melodies up to "Oh Tannebaum" in an extremely amateurish manner, practically unbearable. The food courses were sub-mediocre "international cuisine", only a really good Amarone de Valpolicella could please a little. My God, who serves chicken liver on sticky rice with chocolate sauce?! At half past eleven we ordered the dessert "because of important appointments", the coffee came very shortly after as well as the bill, on which our 3 glasses of champagne cost € 30,-, no tip, we went out to celebrate the new year in the glow of the moon and the stars.

2012-12-Giggi Mangia, Palermo, Sizily - mangiare no!

At the end of 2006 we were the first time in this restaurant, three times in a row!, because a super place, super food, super charming service, just everything at its best. In May 2012 we entered this temple again full of anticipation, but had to leave it heavily disappointed, especially because of the two extremely harsh waitresses, who constantly roamed with disgusted expressions reluctantly through the restaurant, while Gigi, the boss, dressed in a South Tyrolean traditional jacket all the time at the table of his favorite guests. In 2006 there was the best Tarta de Cassata and other selected desserts and Gigi put the ashtrays on the tables at half past ten.

Let's give him another chance! There's no way those waitresses could have lasted those 8 months! But far from it, they were there and we made the big mistake of not escaping back to the street immediately. How can such a thing be, when especially in Italy the waitresses are always extremely amabile?

It came as it had to come: the food had gone down even more, (cassata di pesce spada = a "slice" filled with 90% couscous) for dessert they offered coffee, crème bruleé and panna cotta. We declined and asked for the bill so we could have dessert at Spinazzo (excellent, long open pastry shop) directly across the street. As icing on the cake, the disgruntled waitress asked me for my credit card pin number because otherwise I would have to go to the counter with her since the input machine was not portable. No tip and NEVER AGAIN!

2012-04 BRISTOLINO, Pesaro, Italy - "Uncult boss, scared waitresses and stiffed the bill!"
A neat restaurant in Pesaro, located near the beach in a porch of the Hotel BRISTOL. However, despite the recommendation of the owner's brother-in-law, we could not make friends with the ambience we found. The boss Lorenzo knows how to celebrate himself as a creative gourmet, but seems to have raised a true regiment of terror in the internal relationship with his employees (3 waitresses in absolutely hierarchical gradation). These three ladies seem downright scared and could all win any fast-walking contests. All this would still have been bearable, had we not canceled the main course when the second appetizer arrived (too much food!). This was followed by 50 minutes of stress, during which the main waitress came to our table several times with a tearful face, repeatedly telling us (in fairly good German, after all) that she had encountered considerable resistance in the kitchen during the cancellation. When the third appetizer "scallops" came to the table - typical frozen goods without those orange appendages, au gratin with onions and breadcrumbs, the scallop meat with a slightly fishy character - we were fed up and also no longer felt like discussing further with the main waitress about the canceled main course. My girlfriend made her way out the door, handbag and jacket included, to smoke a cigarette. I went to the restroom, grabbed my jacket as I returned, and so we disappeared. Bye, bye Bristolino!

2014-04 Le Voiler, Bonifacio, Corsica - When money is no object...
and you really want to eat well and enjoy servile staff, then you are in the right place. Super cuisine, everything prepared in the best and most sophisticated way, fresh fish, lobsters from small to gigantic, black pig, wine and water is constantly refilled. But how can it be that a red, normal sized fish for 2 people costs € 100? How can it be that the cheapest wine on the wine list costs € 38,-, although it is available in the supermarket for just under € 9,-? Moreover, the trained staff is eager to drive the bill to extreme heights: "A champagne as an aperitif? We also have today... For dessert we recommend..." On the second evening we were met with a disappointed look when we decided not to have an appetizer. In addition we had expected from the "black pig" for € 30, - actually fillet pieces. It came however with the admittedly outstanding vegetable garnish two extremely fat-containing Kottelets. Ultimately, as almost everywhere in France: everything abundantly overpriced!

2014-04 Hotel Riviera, Bastia, Corsica - Typically French - or poor Bastia and why "Riviera"?
If you have seen the Internet photos and then stand here in front of the building, it can not be true. And one had been so looking forward to it! Ok, we are in France and near the harbor, but can't you design lovely accommodations in places like this. The reception is on the 1st floor, you first have to fight your way through the staircase, which looks like a nasty construction site. But much worse is the disgusting, unbearable smell in the finally reached room, as if a pimp had had a session with 5 of his girls here. Or is this smell even available as a spray? "Room spray - pimp & 5 girls"! In any case, this was not spared! In addition, a plastic sign inside the room door warns not to cook, not to smoke, not to drink alcohol and not to let yourself go lasciviously (should probably mean "no screaming during sexual intercourse!") But at least clear conditions for € 80, - the night!

2014-06 Meson El Pastor - Aranda del Duero, Spain - Lechazo can all!
There are at least 40 asadores in this little village, all with their specialty "cordero lechazo" = "milk lamb from the oven". All of them have this big "horno", i.e. "oven" and there seems to be little difference in quality as a result. But: There are much better places than this asador "El Pastor", especially concerning dishes that go beyond the common milk lamb. And the fact of having such an oven does not justify rude behavior towards the guests! Here, the appetizer "morcilla" is already peppered on the table, even before the wine has appeared, and sometimes a witch-like pony-tailed waitress passes by, who is quite capable of spoiling one's appetite immediately with her nasty corpse-bitter mien. So: It is better to choose another restaurant where, for example, "mollejas" (lamb sweetbreads) are not fried, but offered "cebollado" or "a la Jimenez", i.e. with a slightly sweet note. And even a common salad with bonito (white tuna) can be prepared much better! And that American schmaltzy music in the background doesn't have to be there either. Conclusion: lechazo make all, but cozy and relaxed is somewhere else!

2014-10 Cervejaria Baleal – Lisboa, Portugal

Fish and seafood can only be given two bad treatments:

1) They are ruined with excessive heat.
2) They are not thrown away when they start to go bad.

2014-10 Palacio Hotel Bucasso, Portugal - "Kings? High on the list?"

€ 90 per night in a real, venerable palace in the middle of the countryside doesn't sound like too much. Unfortunately, however, the service and the furnishings of the rooms are so poor that it's not worth staying here even for this price. In addition, the house and its surroundings are constantly the victim of several busloads of tourists from all over the world, who aimlessly roam around here. The hotel guests, whom one becomes aware of at dinner (boring international cuisine, clearly draped portions, youngest and cheapest white wine vintage 2011 for € 26), formed an absolute horror cabinet, at least on "our" evening, which of course can also have interesting aspects, for example, if one is able to feast on the bad behavior of others, or to compare certain faces with characters from obscure movies.

2014-10 Garden Hotel Rossio, Lisboa, Portugal - Absolutely not!
Very central, but practically inaccessible by car. This can be left nearby in a public parking garage for € 20,- / 24 hours. The room per night for over € 140, - is completely overpriced. A loveless bathroom equipment without bathtub and bidet, tiny shower that does not close properly. No minibar. In addition, intrusive security women who check hotel rooms for tobacco abuse, cleaning staff slamming doors in the morning, poor and often completely breaking off wifi reception and foul kitchen stench in the courtyard-side rooms.

On the last night, before we went out to dinner, we had ordered the missing shower gel for the bathroom from the front desk. When we returned at 11:15pm, we found our room door open, lights on, a second swipe card in the door slot, the shower gel we ordered was in the bathroom and fortunately nothing had been stolen from our room. Super hotel!

2014-11 MOJITO, Spain, somewhere in the south - Really very bad!
We really just wanted a beer! And then the worst taco and the worst mojito of my life! Neither the advertised cilantro in the "Taco" nor the mint (Hierba Buena) in the "Mojito" even wanted to make any kind of tasteful appearance. Everything equally without sense, purpose, taste and processing quickly thrown together! The purpose of the taco is to be "rollable". But if the "tortita" is so tiny in diameter and in addition covered in full size, it just doesn't work and you can only get this mess of dough and topping into your mouth with knife and fork. In addition, this host of this "Mexican" bar, who neither speaks Spanish nor otherwise has a Latin background (quite certainly of Turkish origin) and merely reacted angrily to my criticism. But when dishes or drinks are so irredeemably bad, it simply makes no sense to complain anymore! Tourist bar for Yanks or Englishmen who have no idea about anything!

2015-04 Restaurante Flor ,Huesca, Spain - Pre-purchased dirt!
Hardly any people in the kitchen! For here we have one of those typical new restaurants that serve bought-in, prepared food made hot. My sensitive stomach repaid me with a painful night of heartburn.

2014-04 Hotel Girona, Girona Spain - Little space, but no service!
This relatively ugly hotel is in a good place because very close to the center. The use of space is enormous. At least there is still a bidet in the tiny bathroom. There is even less space in the room. The staff downstairs, both at the reception and especially in the breakfast room should absolutely burst away, because an unbearable pile of pig. In the end, you get rid of € 100,- incl. parking and tourism fee - too much for this little space and the bad service! Stupid Catalans! Wiped off the map!

And here is another one about molecular cuisine in Girona...
When you are served a chocolate hemisphere on which the waiter sensationally pours a hot chocolate sauce, which results in the cold chocolate merging with the hot to form a less hot sauce, I find that ridiculous. Ditto these molecule specs that require two-minute explanations of what you're about to ingest.

2015-01 Doña Lala, Tlacotalpan, Mexico - Acceptable food, late disillusionment!
After 3 weeks of traveling in Mexico, the first restaurant where a "recommended tip" (propina) is printed on the bill! And unfortunately, after almost two weeks, the only restaurant with somehow acceptable cuisine on the route between Las Tuxlas and Veracruz.

But do you have to be told by a stupid waiter at 7:30 p.m. that the kitchen has been closed for half an hour when you order two tequila after dessert? Therefore, no tip this time!

2015-01 Hotel Las Mariposas Sotaventes, Tlacotalpan, Mexico - Beautiful hostel for early risers!
A captivatingly beautiful colonial-style house with antique furnishings and art nouveau windows inside. The room is huge, but lacks two chairs and a small table. The beautifully tiled, huge, square bathtub is impressive, but filling it would take about 3 hours with the extremely low water pressure. The lukewarm result can be imagined, as can the shower "pleasure".

Located directly to the side of the cathedral, the merciless church bells wake you up as early as 6:30 a.m. - it then continues every half hour. From 7 a.m. onwards, the maids start having loud conversations right in front of the room door. There is no breakfast. All in all and despite all the beauty: too noisy and too expensive!

But Tlacotalpan with its colorful houses is of course worth a visit!

2015-01 Hotel Geneve, Ciudad de Mexico - Down hui up pfui!

The Geneve has a really impressive entrance hall, but that's it. The rooms are small and of mediocre decor. The people downstairs behind the bar are not able to prepare a decent margarita, and in general you should better avoid the Zona Rosa, because completely overloaded by American chains like Burger King, McDonalds, Kentucky Fried Chicken, Starbucks etc.

2015-01 La Casita, Catemaco - One of the lesser evils

The whole Tuzla area is rather poor, but with Catemaco it has a central place for beautiful discovery trips, jungles, waterfalls, lancha (boat) trips on the lago into mangrove swamps or from the nearby lagoon into even more enchanted biotopes or to the sea (La Barra). The country roads (Caminos) surprise again and again with heavy potholes.

In addition, the Mexican has not invented the good cuisine, at least here. The eating places offer practically all exactly the same dishes, even if in discreetly different quality. The tegogolos (snails from the lake) are quite tasty, as are the "caracoles" (snails from the sea with very tasty, white meat). Instead of "res" (meat from the beef) you better choose "aracherra" (filet), as a preparation method better "a la plancha" than anything else! Drinkable wine is quickly brought from somewhere on request. The people here are all extremely nice and helpful, and at a remarkable level of education that far exceeds that of North Americans.

2015-05 La Castilleria - Santa Lucia, Vejer, Spain – Tasteless!

If you actually get tired of tuna and seafood on the beach, a short trip to Santa Lucia (below Vejer) is a good idea. There are remains of a Roman aquaduct at the top and a little further down a wonderful bar called "Venta el Torro" and again a few meters up this meat restaurant. Unfortunately, it all began with the black-clad waiter at the entrance reproachfully asking us "if we hadn't made a reservation", followed by ONE amuse gueulle for TWO, a kind of cheese cream on which a raspberry was dripping, which would have had to be cut in half if both table partners were to enjoy it. But what if you don't want to nibble from the same plate with your dining partner? Then appetizers: Salmonejo and "gazpacho" of beetroot with pineapple insert, very tasty. After that the meat but only meat, little flavor and all kinds of tendons. But the worst was the music! How cynical or at least tasteless must a landlord be, who expects his guests to listen to this shallow commonplace cocktail of instrumentally played Beatles to Eagles hits etc. of the past 50 years? Much better to order some cold cuts plates and a few glasses of Manzanilla "San Leon" at Venta el Torro! There may even be a corrida on TV right now!

2016-02 Restaurant "CETLI", Tulum, Quintana Roo, Mexico - Be careful with wine and refueling!
Wines are not listed on the menu. Available are one white wine and one red wine. Be sure to ask for prices beforehand! We were charged 600 pesos for the same red wine we had previously bought at the supermarket for 130 pesos. Super profit!

And also be careful at the gas station on the road to the beach and the ruins! Here we fell for the oldest, dumbest trick: Visa card is not accepted, so please cash (efectivo), full tank, 650 pesos. I give the woman a 500 bill and two 100s. She turns away for a moment and exchanges the 500 for a 50 - "that's only 250 pesos!" I, irritated, take the 50 and give her a 500. 450 pesos (€ 22,50) loss! So bills always nicely directly into the hand count!

Well, practically all stores in this Caribbean tourist area (Quintana Roo) are in foreign hands and the common Mexican earns very badly. So then in such a way gladly times nachgeholfen. What else are people supposed to do?

2016-07 Pizzeria Piccola Napoli, Madrid - As a Madrid tourist not at all!
As a Madrid tourist, you should not eat here under any circumstances. Better find a proper Spanish restaurant. This one is bottom of the bar for many of the financially strapped Madrillenians who 1) can't afford anything better and 2) don't know what real Italian cuisine is.

2016-09 The Island, Hanover - Better just a beer at sunset!
The view from the terrace on the Maschsee is already sensational, especially in the evening in good weather including sunset. Surely you can impress friends and acquaintances with it. But that's about it, because if you want to eat something more exciting, you'd better go somewhere else! And if you can only sit inside due to the weather, forget it totaly! Pseudo-regional North German cuisine, but in the end here are only these boring creations of the international gastronomy available everywhere and for the first time in my life I paid € 31, - for a Lugana white wine. Saturated, bourgeois guests, just as affected and boring as the waiters and waitresses. No idea with what justification this Mr. Schuh is hyping himself like this.

2017-01-O&E, San Francisco - The worst for a lot of money!
"Asian, fusion?" Close to Union Square. But the only thing that might seem Asian are the chopsticks served here. Pretty much everything is represented on the menu, but other than a tuna tartare, nothing Asian at all. Meat, meat and more meat! In the end, we ordered two hamburgers, but the ones we wanted were "out". So then the others please! Surprise, surprise! Instead of the white bread patty, two 3cm thick, deep-fried popcorn slices were applied to the top and bottom, as you can buy them in supermarkets in roll form from popped rice. The only edible things left on the plate were the hamburger mince and some spicy marinated pickles. How can this site here be full of good reviews? And you can find proper restaurants in Frisco after all!

2017-01-CLIFT Hotel, San Francisco - Starckey design vs. petty greed!
Union Square! Sounds interesting at first, but it's stinking boring. Also, nearby Chinatown with all its crowded porcelain, bronze, crystal and otherwise "bazaars" all announcing "clearance" is to be avoided at all costs!

The Clift Hotel: Wonderful design by Mr. Phillippe Starck! Unfortunately, however, you soon get the feeling that the management is doggedly trying to invent fees, taxes and other charges for everything and every little thing, so that as a guest your hair soon stands on end. But be careful, there might be a fee for that, too! The shampoo bottles in the bathroom are stingy, in the room there are chocolate talers for $ 2.85 each, the bed is of first quality but much too big for the room, so that one likes to bump his thigh daily on the overhanging footrest! Bruises pre-programmed!

Even if you deduct an obscure pseudo-discount, the breakfast is not worth the money at all, only scrambled eggs, no cheese, no champagne,. And everything is kept so dark that, despite all elegance, even here the suspicion of saving electricity may arise. The parking lot costs $55 per 24 hours, but you don't have direct access to your car, you have to have it fetched, which takes about 15 minutes.
For all its niceness, better not here again!

2018-01 Rusty Pelican, Newport Beach, CA, USA - This is how rusty the Pelican is!
A traditional spot for guests who are "status conscious" and like to spend twice as much money as would be appropriate here! For capacity reasons, the tables are so narrow that you can hardly place appetizers to be partaken in the middle. Even cheap wine is priced at breakneck rates, and some of my tablemates were served stale instant Pepsi Cola. Fish from all over the world but not from here, previously tiny oysters á $ 2.79, supposedly from the East Coast, but tasteless brackish water goods. The thickened crab soup would have come with us from Dr. Oetker, the vaunted garlic bread ($ 4.79) a cheap white bread stick, seafood pasta with standard frozen seafood and tomato sauce (most certainly from the can) came to $ 27 and a portion of spinach to $ 7.59. To the fried swordfish ($ 32) one was allowed to be satisfied with a tomato pea side dish. Once hyped, I guess you don't need to go to any more trouble!

At least my American friend, who had ordered the table and of course thought everything was great, was called because I had left my credit card. We drove back to the restaurant, which was already empty from the beginning. Upon pickup, I thanked and said goodbye to the tie-dyed young pretender with, "Not many people here, are there?" "It's quiet." he gave in reply.

Better take the little ferry to Balboa Island a little further south and find a better place there!

2018-09 Casa Marco, Madrid - Extremely mediocre!
Whoever dares to offer ravioli filled with spinach and ricotta should go straight home! Because pasta like this is mostly industrially made and even if "home-made" is totally boring anyway! There is nothing to save! Just as the ice cream with dried fruits, which is advertised as "Cassata Siciliana", which is often also in Germany in Italian restaurants of lower level on the map and with a real Sicilian "Tarta de Cassata" but also has nothing to do! Plus the bad-tempered blonde waitress, who would be better off taking a job at the post office or a funeral home.

2018-11 Panaría - Poor girls!

Better not take anything here to improve the well-being of the two girls employed here and set an example for the fight against slavery. At peak times, these two girls have to serve about 40 guests at the same time, i.e. take the orders, prepare food and drinks, sell bread and pastries to walk-in customers at the counter, collect the bills, clear the tables again, wash the dishes, and smile in a friendly manner to boot.
That's not how it's done, my dear business owner!

2019-07 Balandro, Càdiz

Very often in Càdiz for 2 years, I always passed by this restaurant because I didn't like the ambience - lots of small round tables set in white with old pink dishes - totally un-Spanish! Now someone had announced that one could eat there nevertheless very well. So: Let's do the test! First bad surprise: All waiters white shirred and with headphone micro in the left ear, for me actually already reason enough to leave the restaurant immediately again. But no, we remained halfway of good courage. The menu was quite lush, but with moderate prices, the wine selection somewhat meager. The dishes were acceptable except for the ravioli "marisco", but nothing more.

Result: Here we have exactly that completely impersonal, typically neo-modern gastronomy, which at best derives its justification from the almost daily arriving huge cruise ships, which tower over almost all houses of the city and spit out thousands of short-haired sunburn tourists into the center of Càdiz.

2022-04 Tuyo ("Yours")Valle Gran Rey, La Gomera - Not mine!
There were advance lorbers: The owner had just hired the "chef" who had previously cooked for the Real Madrid soccer team.
We entered the restaurant, interior somewhat turgid, as if someone had been too long in Bali or the like. The wine list first: there were three reds, one from Chile, a Reserva - not in stock, though I don't order Reservas on principle, and a red from Tenerife, and only a single Blanco. Of necessity, we ordered the Tenerifa Tinto. But how can it be that a self-respecting restaurant chef offers such a ridiculous "wine list"? The completely inept French waitress had pointed out that there were four red wines. But one of the four was just this white wine.
We wanted tuna, short fried - no longer available. So we ordered crocetas, artichokes and three times medregal, a basically excellent fish - about equal to the Spnaic "Pez Limon". The artichokes came out of a jar with a dried tomato on top of each, the inside of the crocetas was unusually compact, while each was totally incongruously topped with a slice of raw tuna. The poor fish appeared dry cooked to death with a vegetable garnish consisting largely of broccoli.
Had this chef cooked for Atletico Madrid, I'm sure he would have been fired the next day. "Tuyo", not mine!

And Aleti won 1:0 against Manchester United the next day! Yes! My club!

2022-07- Noi - Not us! Centrally located tourist trap
A feature on local TV had caught our attention: super paced ambiance and very yummy looking photos on the Tripadvisor website. So there! When finally a map printed on paper found its way to our table: Total disillusionment - a completely ridiculous restaurant! There were only various appetizers and pasta, no fish no meat, but a tasting menu for € 52, - without further details in detail. And the tasting menu only "for the whole table", which later proved to be completely illogical, because each course could have been available at any time, because consisting of the nornal repertoire of the kitchen. So no choice but to order two menus.

Drinks: Why does it take a wine steward to theatrically decant a medium-priced red wine, position the cork on a small plate on our table, and keep sneaking up to refill our glasses?

The food: Not bad but absolutely mediocre, Italian traditional. Nothing to complain about, but ultimately everything produced by the cheapest! Two of these ravioli, not listed on the menu's pasta list, were filled with cheese and surrounded by a sweetened tomato sauce. And a new set of cutlery for each of these tiny courses, especially with knives for a dish where you don't need a knife at all. The poor, hyper-servile waiters who have to explain to you for over a minute what a "Vitello Tonnato" is. "There are capers in it too"! Posturing from a Michelin-starred restaurant with no substance. And in addition boring piano bar music and later at home mild diarrhea and heartburn.